Sure, having a baby is pretty serious stuff..but , it's good to have some humor along with the worries you will be having. So, here are some books to get you going....and remember, laughter, is GOOD for you! Then go on to read and learn more about your partner's pregnancy and all the things you can do to help her! I'm sure however, you'll pick up some tips here......
Rumor has it that THIS book will get you laughing..and into the mindset of becoming a father! Good reading before the more serious texts on pregnancy, labor and delivery.
If you are familiar with Alan Thicke, and like his kind of humor, you just may like this book! Chronicling the pregnancy of his second wife, Gina, he mixes humor with his personal experiences as well as the experiences of other male friends!
Reminder........Got camera equipment? Make sure it works and is loaded with film. But....remember this is your child being born also! Savor the moment. Wait and take some pictures of baby in the nursery (I'm sure your partner will appreciate that too) !
M o r e S u g g e s t i o n s
The Following Suggestions are taken from Pam England's Book: Birthing From Within (more info on this book at the Good Reads page
You can only do so much at the birth. Provide support the best way you can..in your own way. Rub her back, hold her hands..just love her.
Protect her privacy. We tend to lose a certain amount of privacy in a hospital enviornment. If you don't want a student nurse SAY SO. Put a note on the door...no visitors please, to keep unwanted guests out. Screen phone calls, dim the lights. Be her guardian. If she feels safe and comfortable she will have less anxiety.
Be realistic in offering support. The classic example is saying to her.."You're doing fine", and she'll snip back at you and say.."How would YOU know!" Yet she accepts the same comment from a midwife, or nurse. It's best to comment on WHAT YOU SEE: "....everyone says you are doing good," "...You got through that contraction really well", "I love you're determination." and so on.
Take care of yourself. Don't wait for YOUR needs to be noticed. You and other birth companions are usually "invisible". No one is going to offer you a break. Bring your own snacks, food...take your own breaks.
Artwork,Photos, + content (c) 1998 by Lesly T. Federici , U Smile Services.. All rights reserved. info@leslynotes.com
" My being active in our childbirth is the highest form of lovemaking that I have ever experienced
or will ever experience..." unknown
Updated: 6/26/2008
Y o u r G o o d y B a g !
Why not? You're sharing the birth experience with your partner, right? So, here are some ideas of items to bring with you to the hospital: Pencil and/or pen, small notebook to doodle in, important phone numbers, reading material (that interests you) breath mints, tooth brush, wash cloth (to freshen-up) nutritious snack, CAMERA, film, a tripod for the video camera (so you don't have to stand and record - let the tripod do it!) film.
Hope all is well and your newest group of preg's are havingfun. Wehaven't had a chance to let you know how things went til now. On Dec.1 at 1:52pm, we had our son, Jonathan. He was 6 pounds, 7 oz and had his full inventory.
Sue had a false labor at 3:30am on Thursday, the day before, bu twalked
it off. At 3:30am on Friday, it wasn't walking off, so off we went to the , checked in at around 5am, and the labor slowed down a while.They almost sent us home, but her doctor decided to keep us around . At noon, they started the pitocin, but before it really kicked in, she went into labor (yes, with the epidural). He came out a little to soon for Sue, because within 1 +1/2 hours, she went from 1-2 cm to full dilation, and he did quite a bit of internal ripping, but luckily, they stitched her up right after the delivery.
The most amazing thing about being at "ground zero" was that it's nothing like those videos. Maybe it was that it was my baby, or that as soon as I got past the bloodletting and saw his head oozing out, everything changed. Whichever, it was, or both, it was the most incredible thing I'd ever seen, and couldn't look away.
I thought he'd bequiet and still as soon as he came out, and lind of alien-like, covered with that white coating. Not him, he looked likeI expected he would (gefore seeing that video), and he came out swimming. I played with him as soon as the put himin his terrarium, and he had a hell of a grip. He's been a bundle of energy ever since. The next giggest surprise was how many diapers the little guy goes through every day, I'm going to have to buy some Pampers stock!
Hey you men out there! Are you weeks, or even days away from mom birthing your baby? Wipe those beads of sweat off your forehead and remember this-you are just as amazing as mom!
Your role in this whole labor and delivery process is signifigant. You may say to yourself, "well SHE'S doing all the work, what can I do?" and so on, yeah, mom is doing the work of birth, but you have an opportunity to make the work she does easier and less frustrating for her.
How? By altering your perspective on how you view this whole birthing experience.You and mom-to-be are a team, you've been a team, and when you're parents you will continue to be a team in raising your child. What do team members do? They support each other. Provide each other with boosting words of support, when a team member is down-you pick them up, watch their back, protect them, stand up for them, and so on. You have these skills. This is what moms-to-be need.
What DO you do? Here are some thoughts based on my experience working with couples:
* HUG each other daily! Mom does not have a disease, she's just normally pregnat! You need to stay affectionate with each other, and emotionally and physically connected. Take a walk holding hands.
*Men! Childbirth education is NOT a waste of time! It will help her far more when you understand, as mom will learn as well how healthy and normal, and AMAZING the birth process is! Couples / individuals who take childbirth education classes are prepared better than those who don't. Also, the instructor will make or break the class, meaning if it's interesting or boring. Shop around at hospitals AND private classes and what they offer. You can get a lot of information through a phone call!
* Be Proactive! Worrying about what you and mom-to-be may experience is futile. But learning about what you CAN do, or what you can controll
will empower you with confidence.
*Understand the physiological effects of adrenalin on the labor process and why it's important to relax mom as much as possible during labor.
* Take on the responsibility of LEADER/GUIDE, when practicing breathing techniques, and when in actual labor. This is so important because mom just needs to labor and have the baby. She can't be telling you what to do at the same time. When you take the lead, you take additional pressure off her.You can take a great deal of pride in knowing how much you helped her as a result.
